so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Randomize
