GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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