You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
