so explain again why im purple
no
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
