Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
