And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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