I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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