Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
