Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
