Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize
