My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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