My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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