I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
