his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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