from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize
