No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
