Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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