New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
