Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize