I'd wear matching sweaters with you
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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