I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
