He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize