My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize