How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
my liver is dry heaving
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
