Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
