I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Just puked most of my soul out..
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
