"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize