I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
