none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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