Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize