It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
