whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
19 People Did The Wildest Things When They Were Black-Out Drunk
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
21 Signs That A Dude is Probably Insane
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.