11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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