I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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