i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
