Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
