i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
