Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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