We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Randomize
