i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
