U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
