so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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