i don't plan on having that self control this summer
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
