Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
do herpes really smell.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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