U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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