I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
