she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
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Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
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I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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