Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
