it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
