I have demons in me.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
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